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Re(Pro) # 60: Lucy Wilkins

Lucy Wilkins We are in good co

In case you’ve been living under a rock or are brand new to the scene, Brit Lucy Wilkins and her New York-based business partner Sara have made quite the (booze-free) splash in 2018 with their biz, We are in Good Company (weareingood.co). Their vision is to make space for sober by creating a world where it’s just normal to be living life substance-free. And they do that through whimsical greeting cards with messages that are simple, quirky, funny, powerful. For Dry January, Lucy and Sara are featuring a different sober rockstar every day on their Instagram feed and asking them poignant questions about why they choose sober. [I was day 14 - since January 14th was my 11.5 year anniversary <3]. Get ready for a big year with Lucy and Sara and weareingood.co!
I mean, Brad Pitt and Elton John and Natalie Portman and Blake Lively and Demi Lovato and Bradley Cooper and Dax Shepard and Zac Efron and Kristin Davis and Robert Downey Jr. and Rob Lowe and Lana Del Ray are all sober. [source:
Vanity Fair]
Trust me when I say we’re in good company!

xo,
Laura


We imagine a world where being sober is not questioned or anonymous, but out in the open for the undeniably positive choice it is.
— Lucy and Sara, weareingood.co

Name: Lucy Wilkins

Age: 43

Location: London, UK

Recovery date*: 12/18/17
[Editor’s note: Happy belated 1 year anniversary, Lucy!]
*turning point for substance use and/or mental health challenges

Creative niche: Art, design, entrepreneurship

Recovery story in a nutshell:

nutshell

I stopped drinking to support a loved one who had issues with alcohol. I've always been able to take it or leave it, know when I've had enough and call it a night. My loved one doesn't - they have no off switch. Watching them as they slowly got deeper and deeper into the clutches of alcohol was heartbreaking.

Fortunately they stopped and little by little they turned their life around. I was so impressed by the change, the huge and positive impact it had made on their life that I was inspired to give it a go too.

I can honestly say it has surprised me how much better I feel... I didn't have an 'issue' with alcohol but without it I have more patience, more time and more energy. I very rarely miss it. Sure, Christmas is harder when everyone equates festive fun with having a drink but I look at my kids and see how much fun they're having just high on life and the feeling soon dissipates.


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Top 5 Recovery/Wellness Tools

1) Books - fact or fiction or Harry Potter

2) Long walks - with or without a dog, a chance to blow away the fog

3) Time with good friends - ones who get your story and love you anyway

4) 8 hours of solid sleep - for me, there is no better reset button

5) Making stuff - spending time creating is good for the soul


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Connect with Lucy and weareingood.co

Website: www.weareingood.co
Instagram: @weareingoodco

Re(Pro) #16: Joey Bradford

I've known Joey, in some capacity, for all of 2016.  We made each others' "e-quaintance" back in January and it's been such a treat to watch what she and her BFF in life and business, Persia, are creating in the holistic wellness and recovery worlds.  Plus they're British.  That just makes everything more fun :)  Stay tuned for a rockin' interview and make sure to buy their new book, The Inner Fix!
Love you, Joey darling, my fellow Sober-at-24-er!
xo,
Laura


Name: Joey Bradford

Age: 28

Location: London, England.

Recovery date (turning point for addiction or mental illness): 05/05/2012

Creative niche (art, music, writing, entrepreneurship, etc.):
Co-founder of lifestyle movement Addictive Daughter (coach/ healer/ author)

If applicable, drug of choice (or not of choice...): Alcohol

Recovery Story in a Nutshell:

My ‘rock bottom’ was gradual. By 24, a series of events left me with a niggling feeling that I perhaps needed to look at my relationship with alcohol (in fact, on and off, I’d had thoughts about this since I was 17 or so).

The nudge to do so came just after I’d badly fallen out with my best friend over the Christmas period in 2011 during a drink and drug-fuelled evening of chaos (where my behaviour was very much at fault, unfortunately). Ironically, this is the same friend I later went on to set up positive lifestyle movement Addictive Daughter with!

Immediately after our fall-out, I began dating an alcoholic who was several years sober and in recovery. The six months we spent together gave me an opportunity to lay off the drink almost completely and experience the many benefits that came with that.

Then, having hardly touched alcohol for almost half a year, I went on a massive bender whilst on holiday without him. I spent 12 hours passing out and vomiting until I was just retching air, begging to be taken to hospital. I returned home from my trip to be broken up with (my boyfriend had met someone else during the time I was away, and promptly married her - but that’s a story for another day.)

Although I was obviously hurt, I remember panicking more about having to go back to my ‘old lifestyle’ than losing him from my life. And then the light bulb moment came… I didn’t have to. I could do sobriety for me.

Realising that pretty much every negative occurrence in my life had happened as a result of being under the influence helped me to see that building a substance-free life could be a positive step for me.

In my early months of sobriety, I learned a lot about myself; I loved waking up clear-headed and remembering everything I had said and done the night before, my skin was clearer, my eyes were brighter and I felt inspired and motivated.

However, I also began to discover how dependent I was on alcohol to have a ‘good time’ socially - in order to feel confident and relaxed. Working through this was a challenge at first, but one I became willing to take on. It was important to me to learn how to become comfortable in my own skin, without the aid of substance.

Over the past 4 years, living alcohol-free has become much more ‘normal’ to me, as well as those I’m closest with. Many people respect and even, dare I say, admire it as a lifestyle choice. Total sobriety has cracked me wide open to a more spiritual way of life, which wasn’t something I’d anticipated or set out to pursue particularly. That said, I’m really grateful for the unexpected detour. I talk about my journey into sobriety and how a relationship with a ‘power greater than myself’ has evolved in Addictive Daughter’s new book, The Inner Fix

Last year, I married a gorgeous man - a filmmaker - who is also sober (in recovery from drug addiction). Today, my life feels uncomplicated, honest, exciting, free and more purposeful than it’s ever felt before.

 

Top 5 Recovery Tools

 1) Letting go of other peoples’ responses to my lifestyle choice.

Not everyone wants to be around a sober person because you are a mirror to others peoples’ choice - and that can be uncomfortable for some people. I am pretty sure that I’m a fun, open, friendly person a lot of the time, but people who aren’t on this path can create distance relationally, and identify it as ‘boring’ or ‘too good’. I’ve learned that this is more about their way of relating to sobriety, rather than evidence of who I am. Friendships evolve, change, fade and sometimes even reignite again. I’m learning to allow my relationships to ebb and flow, as they need to. 

2) Not comparing my ‘rock-bottom’ to someone else’s.

The only thing that’s ever led me to entertain drinking again is hearing someone else’s story and thinking, ‘that is so much worse than my own, I guess I could have gone down further.’ But then I remember that I’d prefer not to do that, actually! The truth is, my journey got bad enough for me. And that’s really all there is to it. The fact that I was just 24 when I embraced a sober way of life is something I am grateful for. A lot of good stuff has happened since then - more than I could have dreamt of really - and much of that’s down to the clarity sobriety has given me.

 3) Surrounding myself with ‘radiators’.

In workshops run by Addictive Daughter, we talk about ‘drains and radiators’. ‘Drains’ are people who sap your energy, remind you of your limits and generally bring negative and low-frequency vibes. ‘Radiators’ do the opposite - they lift you up, help you to feel expansive and bring light and warmth. Socially, I try to surround myself with radiators as much as I possibly can, particularly when life feels fragile.

 4) Remaining open and teachable

A lot has shifted for me over the past few years, particularly my attitude towards spirituality. I was a complete atheist until a few years back. I’ve become more open-minded, and as a result, have encountered some pretty unbelievable (in a good way) things. I try my best to remain open to new experiences and ideas, as I know this is just the beginning and that I’ll continue to grow if I’m open to it.

 5) Prayer & meditation

I read this quote by Yoga Bhajan recently: “Prayer is when you talk to God; meditation is when God talks to you.” Prayer comes quite easily to me these days (that wasn’t always the case, but I’ve found my feet with it and now, there’s no stopping me.) Meditation I find harder, because my mind can get so busy and I struggle to sit in stillness for extended periods of time. I 100% see the value in it, and I hope to continue to develop in this area! On days when my mind is in overdrive, I find running or journaling really helpful. The rhythmic nature of running gets me into a trance-like state - I get such release and many epiphanies from a good old run!

 


Connect with Joey & Addictive Daughter.

Book (just released!): The Inner Fix!)
Website: www.addictivedaughter.com
Instagram: @joey_bradford
Twitter: @Joey_Bradford_